How many times have you said "why does this keep happening to me?" or "I'm nice and giving, why is everyone else so selfish?" There may be truth in those statements, but that isn't the problem. What is? Why do we always come to the same conclusion?
That's the "Story in Our Head".
I've talked about repeating patterns in my book "The Hero's Journey Challenge". After I plunged into the depths of The Abyss, I clearly had a pattern that wouldn't go away. That pattern was lack of resilience. After being beaten down so many times by people, situations, and myself, I got stuck in The Story that kept things from changing. I became unresilient. Now it took someone else to point this out to me (thank you to my Therapist). I saw a clear pattern that kept me down and therefore I had a belief that I wasn't going to be good enough at anything in the future (Hello Loser).
How do we change the Story in Our Heads?
Simply by being aware of them. The next time I see "nothing good" in a situation, I come back to the awareness that I'm telling myself "The (same old) Story". If I want to stay stuck I can continue to feel sorry for myself and believe that I am just a Loser (which is asking the Universe for a jerk to kick me again). Or, I can say to myself: Self, you are telling that Story again, be aware that there is a lesson, or some good going on instead.
The kind Universe will break open a cloud from there, because Awareness is the key!